A Knack for Bad Luck
by Alliebeth
Summary: Two spoonfuls in, Felicity put the utensil down, somewhat horrified. "Oh dear god. I'm Bridget Jones, and I don't even have a diary." Olicity. Misunderstandings lead to consequences, but for who? Will be light-ish hearted, some sexual content.


**A Knack for Bad Luck**

 **This idea has been kicking around in my head for a while. Please know that I am totally messing up the timeline of the season to make my story fit better, so don't expect it to be chronologically correct! Will take a chapter or two to set up, but it will be good, so stick with me -A**

 **Chapter 1: Bleeding Heart**

"I knew as soon as we talked, it would be over," Felicity whispered, meeting Oliver's gaze with tears in her eyes and stone in her heart.

Words began to form on Oliver's lips as she turned on her heel, but sticking around to hear them seemed unnecessary. He had been clear, yet again, that they could not be together for this or that very serious, very annoying reason. Something that felt like resentment started to lurk on the edges of her emotions, and for the first time, Felicity let it in. Everyone had been _so_ happy just moments before, meeting Digg's daughter for the first time. She was scrumptious, after all. That new baby smell is just the best. And of course, Oliver had to go and _ruin the moment_.

"He's the goddamn master of ruining moments!" Felicity muttered a little bit too loudly as she entered the parking garage attached to the hospital. Her heels clicked angrily on the pavement, and it felt good.

Sinking into the driver's seat, her phone buzzed. A text message from Digg.

"Where are you? Did something happen? Was Oliver an ass?"

"Going home. Yes. Yes. You have better things to worry about. Give that little peanut a kiss from Auntie Felicity xoxo." She hated emoticons, but hugs and kisses were acceptable in this case.

The car roared to life and Felicity spent the next three minutes scanning the radio for an acceptable angry-at-my-not-boyfriend song. A gritty voice came through the she turned up the volume until it made her sternum vibrate.

" _Let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the floor..."_

Okay, so not her usual alternative rock groove, but it _did_ fit the occasion. That is until her mind started making a web of connections. Oliver used to drop bodies. Now he's haunted by his actions and the danger he's brought upon everyone he cares about. Which is why they can't be together.

Felicity scowled and tuned the radio to a different station for the drive back to her apartment, where she promptly changed into striped orange PJ pants and a ratty tank top, procured a pint of strawberry cheesecake ice cream from the freezer, and collapsed onto the couch to watch whatever happened to be on TV and was not romantic _whatsoever._

Two spoonfuls in, Felicity put the spoon down, somewhat horrified.

"Oh dear god. I'm Bridget Jones, and I don't even have a diary."

 _Go, you idiot, stop her!_ Oliver's head screamed at him. All he could manage to do was watch Felicity's ponytail disappear as she rounded the corner towards the elevators. When the clicking of her heels disappeared, he knew she was gone. Words had formed on Oliver's lips, but that's as far as they had traveled.

He spun around to see Diggle staring him down from halfway down the hallway. Sheepishly, Oliver made his way towards him.

"How much of that did you see?"

"More than enough to know you're a dumbass," Digg replied, crossing his arms over his chest.

"I don't know if I can protect her or this city if we're together, if I'm not 100% on my game. I can't take that chance," Oliver scowled, looking away. Digg did not look convinced. "People could die, John."

"People could always die. That's the risk we take, and we are _all_ well aware of that risk, Felicity included. So, all that I know, Oliver, is that you just 100% broke that girl's heart. No 'ifs' about it," Digg spat. Felicity was like a little sister to Digg, and seeing Oliver do this to her (and to himself) just made him angry.

"She's better off without me." Oliver hoped it sounded convincing, because he could feel the lie twisting in the pit of his stomach.

The next few weeks passed relatively uneventfully, if by uneventfully you mean helping Team Arrow take down dangerous criminals almost every night, untangling deadly mysteries, and getting an amazing job with a super swanky office.

That last bit was not exactly helping the Oliver situation, as the new job came with a new billionaire genius boss who, unabashedly, had the hots for Felicity. She wasn't exactly giving Ray Palmer the cold shoulder, either. Why should she?

Oliver had been politely cold to her since their little "talk" at the hospital, and Felicity didn't feel the need to change that. At least that's what she told herself every day. Every time his gaze lingered a little bit longer than it should have, every time they were quietly alone in the lair together, every time they accidentally made contact, she reminded herself that _he_ was the reason there was no _we._ But still... _if only the dreams would stop._ She didn't really mean it, but at least thinking it every now and again made her feel like less of a liar.

In reality, the frequent dreams she had of Oliver were probably...scratch that, definitely, not healthy. In Felicity's defense, not all of them were dirty. Only about 95%. _If_ she had a therapist, he would probably tell her that they were the result of her pent up emotions and attractions towards Oliver bubbling to the surface and that she should deal with her feelings while she was awake. Fortunately or unfortunately, Felicity had rationalized that her sexy fantasies were actually the one good thing that came out of their breakup (was it even a breakup considering they had been together about thirty seconds?). Her consolation prize – and consoleherself, she did, despite the fact that she sometimes felt it a bit ironic that she was having mind-blowing sex dreams about a man she had never actually had sex _with_.

"Oliver, I've moved on." Felicity tried her best to stand up straight and look her reflection square in the eye as she said the words.

"Oliver, there's someone else, and I'm moving on. With him."

 _Ugh, no, this is terrible!_ Felicity paced back and forth in front of her bathroom mirror, trying to find the best way to break the news to Oliver that she and Ray were officially an item now. She took a deep breath, shaking out her arms in an effort to loosen up her robotic tone.

"Oliver, you remember my boss, Ray?," She stared back at the smile on her face. "I'm sleeping with him now." She sunk down to the cool tile floor and buried her face in her hands.

"I suck."

 _Of course I waited until the last minute to tell him._ Felicity shook her head. In just a few short hours, she would be on television, standing next to Ray at a very important press conference for everyone to see. Which is exactly where she should be, given that she was now Vice President of Ray's company. _Crap. I didn't tell him that either..._

* * *

"Oliver, I think you should see this." Diggle had just turned on the TV and came across Ray Palmer's press conference. Seconds after summoning him, Diggle was sorely regretting asking Oliver to join him.

There, standing not two feet to Palmer's left, was Felicity. Their Felicity, beaming up at Ray Palmer like he'd just cured cancer or something of equally impressive magnitude. Diggle tried to hide his expression, but it was too late. Oliver, along with Roy, had already come over to watch.

"Why is Felicity there?" Oliver asked immediately. In the uncanny manner that is live television, the answer became clear very quickly.

"I, along with Vice President, Felicity Smoak, think that there's a lot to a name. And so, to mark the beginning of a new era for our company, a truly fresh start, today we announce the renaming of Queen Consolidated to Palmer Technologies."

Oliver could think of nothing he'd like better than to beat the smug smirk off of Palmer's face. His fist tightened at his side. The way she looked at him, and the way he returned her adoring smile. The smile that used to be only for him. It made his blood boil so hot he thought he might explode if he didn't get out of there soon.

"Judging from the looks on both of your faces, she didn't feel the need to tell any of us this, did she?" Roy chimed in.

"No, but Felicity's personal life isn't our business," Oliver answered coldly, although the defeated look in his eyes told a different story. He disappeared from the main room and reappeared minutes later, fully suited up in his Arrow gear.

"Are you sure you should be going out right now, man?" Digg asked. It was clear Oliver's head was not on straight now that he had put two and two together with Felicity and Palmer.

"I need to hit something," Oliver replied honestly.


End file.
